To actually see a post they may or may not care about, but it has nothing to do with projects... :)
I happened across a person's blog today, and spent half the day reading the posts... It's not that they were necessarily witty, humorous, or anything else... I could relate to MOST of them! By reading the posts, SO many memories were brought up you can't even make it up! I also appreciated the whole, "Who cares if my post pisses you off, this is what I feel." mentality...
That's how I feel! I didn't always feel that way, but I do now. I LITERALLY could care less if something I say causes someone to 'feel bad' or whatever, I say what I want because I stopped being politically correct a few years ago and have NEVER been happier!! I intend it to STAY that way! I say what is on my mind, if people don't like it, then don't listen! I disagree with so many people, and sometimes I DON'T speak up when I should, I'm trying to change that though!!
It's almost like everyone lives in a "What will everyone think?"; "Oh my, what if the neighbors knew?"; "I could never let them know what I really think!"... etc, etc, etc type of life... It's STUNNING!! Why can't people just say what they think? Why are people so easily offended?? I've reached the point in my life that I could give a shit who gets offended by what I say, that's what I think, if you don't like it, I could care less!! We can discuss it if you want, but it's doubtful that I will change my mind, so good luck trying. If you want to not talk to me any more, whatever, I'm sure it's probably just as well! Anyone who is going to get anal about some stupid position on some topic (insert it here) that may or may not have anything to do with anything, yeah! I probably DON'T want to have anything to do with you ever again either! IDIOTS!!
What's the point of this whole thing, I'm just tired of the bullshit, that's all. I want it straight, to the point, don't placate me, don't act like you like me if you don't (because I could give two shits honestly), and just give it to me like it REALLY is!! That's all! :)
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19 comments:
I just think that WAY too many people live their lives in ways that they would not if they were honest with themselves! BE honest with yourselves, make changes... What do you have to lose???
I read a lot of her posts today too. Although she and I likely disagree on everything from politics to religion to feminism, I also enjoyed her candor and 'who cares what anyone else thinks' mentality. She didn't even WANT comments - LOL!
I don't mind disagreeing with people, hell, Titus and I disagree on everything under the sun, yet he is my best friend... Just be honest is all... :)
Actually the only person we should be concerned about what they think of us is God. That should be our only desire - to please Him.
Exactly Joshua!
I was thinking more about this on the way to work. A lot of people confuse being kind to others with pleasing others. They seem to think that since we're supposed to be kind to people that this means we can't say anything that would hurt their feelings.
However - when we say things that aren't true just to please people, we're actually doing more harm than if we just spoke the truth.
I know I have personally encountered people at the office and other places who acted like they liked me or wanted to be friends etc., when I was around by the way they talked and said things. But, then come to find out, they didn't really like me - they were just afraid of hurting my feelings, so they pretended they liked me when I was around.
We're WAY too caught up in this "politically correct" thinking. We often say things just because we know that's what the person we're talking to wants to hear. Which is completely wrong.
It is more important to be honest about one's feelings and thoughts. And while I realize we'll never come to a place where everyone speaks the truth...at least speak the truth yourself.
Personally - I'd rather know how your REALLY feel about something, or where you REALLY stand on an issue than to be lied to because your're afraid of hurting my feelings.
I agree with most of what you all are saying. But if you don't like someone or you do like someone do we have to tell everybody we know where they stand? Do most people even care? I know with family and close friends we should, but what about the rest? Do we really care or do they even care if we like them or not? I doubt it. So, why go and tell them?
I know I like a lot of people, but I am not going to tell everyone I know, "I like you" nor will I do it if I didn't like them. I agree we should always be honest, but I do think there is a fine line in being honest and down right mean.
Why be mean? Everyone has their own story that we may not know all the details.
There are so many people in this world that we just have to be pleasant as often as possible.
just my 2 cents :D
---jackie
Interesting discussion. I think there is a difference between stating your true beliefs on a website and just telling everyone you see what you think of them. *lol* I believe that (if you want to act like a Christian anyway) you have to factor kindness and tact in with the honesty... at least in most situations.
I keep hearing people say things like Josh said about how they'd rather people be honest and hurt their feelings than to placate them with lies... but when it really comes down to it... how would you REALLY react if someone said "no, I don't like that idea" or "no, I DON'T like your new hairdo" or "no, I think you are a bad husband/wife/parent/worker/whatever"... it would take TRUE humbleness to accept someone else's true opinions with grace. And we humans are full of pride and prone to get angry or upset when people truly are honest with us. So most of us just tell people what they want to hear b/c we frankly just don't want to deal with someone's hurt ego. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, it's just how it is. And while I don't feel I'm responsible for another person's reaction to me being honest, I STILL don't like hearing their pouty reactions (to my face or behind my back).
p.s. I don't have to agree with someone to enjoy being with them either - I don't like being around those who feel all their friends must agree with them on every point - but I don't purposefully strike up arguments with them on the points we disagree on either. Only if something is brought up, do I state how I feel on the topic (and I try to do that with kindness and tact... as stated before).
Like Jackie said, just my 2 cents. :)
Daniel and Michelle had their baby yesterday!!! I just heard. All went well. :)
I think one can be honest and be kind at the same time. Take for instance Petra's example of "no, I don't like that idea" or "no, I DON'T like your new hairdo". Saying something like that isn't really too kind. However - saying "Oh, I love your idea" when they really DO NOT love it is what I'm referring to.
I'm not implying that one should go around telling people - "NO - I don't like you!" etc. BUT - I don't like it when people pretend to feel a certain way about something or when they say something just because they think you want to hear that.
Well, I wasn't necessarily saying that if someone wears a ridiculous outfit to the office you should say, "Yo honey, um that oufit isn't working for you AT ALL, you might want to rethink that on your lunch break!"
As far as bad worker, etc though, of course they should be told, maybe not by their peers, but certainly by their superiors. They do that all day long where I work, "You are the least effective person here, shape up or your out of here!"
I don't think you have to necessarily run around telling everyone everything you think, but if someone asks, shoot yeah! Give it to them straight! Even something as simple and perhaps as ridiculous as if I were to ask someone if they liked my (insert here: hair/outfit/etc) I would certainly want them to be honest with me. Of course I could care less what anyone would think of my hair, outfit, etc, so I would never ask... :)
You don't care what people think about your hair Matthew????
LOL - no! :)
Also, I think everyone should get over the whole PC thing... We are raising an entire generation of weak, easy-to-offend wusses! If a particular word/phrase/whatever offends you so much that you are going to have to start taking prozac, take a leave of absence from work and not be able to function, then you should, imo, be eliminated from the population, issue resolved... :)
I agree with Josh and Matt about you do not have to be mean but also do not have to lie just to preserve someone's feelings. I am very polite to people but try to also always be honest which is difficult for me since my tendency is just to agree with whatever they say so they will stop talking to me :).
I got a little lost on this one I have to admit - who got you so riled up? just curious to read the blog that got that reaction -
My thoughts on the discussion: I think that most people ABSOLUTELY DO care if someone tells them something mean about themselves, people don't like to be told there are things wrong with them. Why be mean about it? Why not just keep your mouth shut if you have something awful to say? It's better and it doesn't stir up trouble that doesn't need to be caused - unless it's something that could cause a huge problem and needs to be discussed openly, I say, don't. JMTC too :)
Also: "If a particular word/phrase/whatever offends you so much that you are going to have to start taking prozac, take a leave of absence from work and not be able to function, then you should, imo, be eliminated from the population, issue resolved... " on this topic: if you think that you understand what exact environment everyone came from the morning before they stepped into work - you can't possibly. How do you know that the person that is taking prozac and gets offended so easily isn't being beat or abused in someway at home? There could be a lot of other things happening in that persons world that could deserve a "shoulder" or a "if you need to talk, I'm here" kind of response, not a YOU DESERVE TO DIE response... seems a bit harsh. Caring about people is important, and is why we are Christians - Why would Jesus allow all of those people to follow him around and listen to him all that time if he didn't care about them? Why would he go out of his way to help others that needed it, without asking for anything in return if he didnt care? Aren't we admonished to ask the question "What would Jesus do?" - maybe that person in the office that is sooo fragile just needs to be told how powerful and strengthening a relationship with Christ could be for them... its a scary world out there without God. I say hand that person one of Josh's flyers to go and find out how they can be happier.
Perhaps you don't follow my blog that closely, but the: "imo, be eliminated from the population, issue resolved" is humor!!! Perhaps not your type, but whatever! OF course I don't think that way. I'm likely one of the nicest people you will ever meet! I just say, BE honest! You don't HAVE to be mean, but just be honest!!!
ah - guess I misunderstood the topic of discussion - I've had a lot of serious things going on in my world as of late, and might need to add a little humor - I've had a few people pass away I've known for years - it hits home.
:)
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